Do you know what it’s like to be a hot girl?  I do.  I looked everyday in the mirror.  I wanted to fuck what I saw there.

I could walk into any place, and I knew that I could have any guy in there.

The confidence.  The swagger.  Forget that I was always a misanthrope with unpopular ideals.  Forget that I was kind of a bitch.  Forget that social situations have always been the bane of my existence.  I ruled them with ease.  Because sex is King, and if you rule that realm – you rule places that would normally be far beyond your reach.

Do you know what it is to lose control?  To lose that part of yourself which you had relied on for so long?  It is nothing short of traumatic.  It takes all of your power and puts it, at the very least, into question.

If you are a very stable person, very well-rounded and grounded, then you whether the storm, and you retain composure.  You hold onto your lands through sheer will, and with the self assurance that your worth  is more substantial than your looks.

If you are not then you find yourself displaced in a familiar place.  A stranger in your own territory.  Allies – few and far between.  Family, well-intentioned friends.  But the mirror is the nemesis that seems to be everywhere all the time.  Reality is a bitch.  Self-esteem is a pipe-dream.  Chase it if you will, at least you’ll be burning calories. 

Inner self-worth is that which we should all strive to attain, because you’ve got to have a plan B.

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